Sunday, December 29, 2019

Begone 2019, this year of horror

1. What did you do in 2019 that you’d never done before?

Oh jesus. Nothing, and everything. Does that make sense? Everything seemed old and jaded this year AS WELL AS bewilderingly new and overwhelming. This truly was the year best summed up by the age-old adage of "Well, at least you didn't die..."  
2. Did you keep your New Year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year?

 I did, surprisingly. And then I realized that those resolutions were shit in the first place, and keeping them did not make me happy and content after all. So there's that.

Definitely making more resolutions for next year, though. 

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?

Yes! Multiple friends had multiple ickle babies this year! 2019 was full of progeny!

4. Did anyone close to you die?

No, thank god.

5. What countries did you visit?

Vietnam! But that was a continuation of my December 2018 trip -- so it probably does not count. Within India, we went to Gushaini in Himachal for Holi, and then for a surprisingly calming trip to Bangalore in June. There was a kinda awkward, but okay work trip to Nainital in July as well. And of course the obligatory Kolkata and Benares things happened. We're also set to go to Shimla for a quick year-end getaway. Looking back, this year was very VERY low in travel. 

6. What would you like to have in 2020 that you lacked in 2019?

Work-life balance. Oh dear God, some work-life balance would be good.]

7. What date from 2018 will remain etched upon your memory?

7th June, I think. I left a long and dearly held job for newer horizons that day. It was a disorienting time. 

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
  • Changing my job
  • Starting the side thing
  • Not losing my mind completely

9. What was your biggest failure?

Not getting the side thing off and running, like we thought we would. Not sticking to the health resolutions. Really not paying attention to friends and family, and pouring all my energy into work instead. 

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?

Yup. Brain completely melted, taking my mental health with it.
11. What was the best thing you bought?

Tickets to Bangalore, I think.

12. Whose behaviour merited celebration?


13. Whose behaviour made you appalled and depressed?

Most of India's.

14. Where did most of your money go?

Flight tickets. Food. Cats. Books. 

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?

Nothing. Not a single damn thing elicited any sort of overwhelming excitement. It was a shitty, shitty year, Watson.

16. What song/album will always remind you of 2019?

Cold/Mess - Prateek Kuhad

17.Compared to this time last year, are you:

1. Happier or sadder? Sadder.
2. Thinner or fatter? Same.
3. Richer or poorer? Richer, but not happier about it.

18. What do you wish you’d done more of?

Just chilling. Staring at the skies. Walking around the city. Pottering around the house. Essentially, anything that's not work.

19. What do you wish you’d done less of?


20. How will you be spending Christmas?

I spent Christmas watching a movie, and then drinking spiked hot chocolate with old friends. There was pasta and chicken too. 'Twas a good day.

21. Who did you spend the most time on the phone with?

Office people. (Blergh.)

22. Did you fall in love in 2019?


23. How many one night stands in this last year?


24. What was your favourite TV programme?

  • Killing Eve
  • Fleabag
  • Russian Doll
  • Queer Eye Japan
(TV was quite deliciously good this year.)

25. Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?


26. What was the best book(s) you read?

Paul Kalanithi's "When Breath Becomes Air" made me publicly bawl in a metro. So, that was something. I was also introduced to Patrick Rothfuss, who provided my yearly fantasy fix quite satisfactorily.

27. What was your greatest musical discovery?

Prateek Kuhad, I think. Though that was hardly a new discovery. I just listened to him a lot this year. Also, all the old comforting Faiz songs were played on loop.
28. What did you want and get?

The new job.

29. What did you want and not get?

A work-life balance. Peace.

30. What were your favourite films of this year?

Marriage Story was absolutely delicious. I loved Lady Bird too. 

31. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?

Quite disappointing birthday all around. Even the birthday dinner was kinda shit. Hoping this next year is better.

32. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?

Just figuring out the thing that would provide me the most mental peace.

33. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2019?

Corporate slave, but forgot to comb her hair.
34. What kept you sane?

Books and therapy and cats. 

35. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?

Neil Gaiman, in perpetuity.

36. What political issue stirred you the most?

Oh God, so many. I went to so many protests this year. Marched so many times. This world is going to hell in a handbasket, and I have decided to not go silently into the night. Kashmir was fucked, and so were minorities in India. 
BJP won an overwhelming majority in the Lok Sabha elections. Boris Johnson became UK's PM, and it looks like Brexit is a done deal. But maybe it is true that it is the darkest before dawn. (Fingers crossed).

37. Who did you miss?

My friends, all in one place.

38. Who was the best new person you met?

M, maybe? But the bar is rather low.

39. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2018.

Be careful, for what you wish for might just become true.

40. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year?

I wish I could leave you my love,
But my heart is a mess...